My mom was Wonder Woman.
Talents
My mom could sing soprano, sew, and juggle. In fact, she sewed her wedding dress and my Little Red Riding Hood cloak for Halloween.
Languages
My mom could speak Vietnamese, French, and English by the time that she was 25. She taught me how to order food in French.
Experience
Huong Quynh Ngo was born in Sai Gon during the Viet Nam War. She was the eldest child and the only daughter. My grandfather was a soldier, and my grandmother was an accountant in the South Vietnamese Navy.
My mom played competitive ping pong while growing up.
After the War ended, she and her family tried to escape, but were caught by the Soviets and sent to re-education camps. She was around 13.
In 1988, she received advice from an American journalist to annoy the North Vietnamese Government. After three years, my mom and her family could leave. They moved to Atlanta, where she got a job as a translator for a women’s self-defense class while pursuing her master’s and PhD.
She met my dad in 1992, and they got married in 1995. She earned her PhD in 1998.
Funny Stories
The French Screaming Match
My parents visited France in 1998 and took the train to Argenton-sur-Creuse. My dad asked the conductor about the protests on the platforms. The conductor refused to talk to my dad because he didn’t speak French. My mom then screamed at the conductor in French for disrespecting my dad.
The Maternity Leave Mix Up
My mom was a graduate accounting professor and had a substitute while she went on maternity leave. After she came back, my mom wanted to say to her substitute, “I now have a career, and a beautiful baby daughter. Thank you, Professor, for filling in for me.” Instead, she said, “I now have a career, and a beautiful baby daughter. Thank you, Professor.”
The Ice Cream Chaser
My mom took me and my brother on her business trips. She also took her parents to babysit us while she worked. One day, she was in a conference meeting. The curtains were drawn, but it was warm and sunny, so the light still came through. She then saw the silhouette of an elderly woman in a wool hat running around. Apparently, she thought, “OK, my mother isn’t crazy. There are other elderly women who wear wool hats in summer.” Her relief was unfortunately short-lived when she saw that silhouette with ice cream chasing two kids. She leaned over to the colleague next to her and said, “That’s not my family.”
The Maole
As long as I could remember, my mom didn’t have a mole, so this picture surprised me. She said that she had it removed. When I asked her why, she said that she didn’t want to look like Mao.
My mom was intelligent, talented, and funny. She was one in a million. Even the way that she died was one in a million.
Why am I saying this?
Measuring Up
I had to move back in with my dad after things didn’t go how I desperately wanted them to. Everyone around me soared off into their futures. My mom literally survived a war and re-education and became a tenured graduate professor. What’s my excuse?
I felt like an embarrassment. It seemed that the more I tried anything (3D modeling, pool, finding jobs, etc.), the worse I got. Nothing I did mattered. I felt that I let everyone down.
I felt that I let my mom down.
Learning to Settle
I will never be the woman that my mom was, because she truly was Wonder Woman. But what if I could settle for being inspired by her?
I’m a lot better at pool and ballroom dancing than I was in 2022. I am building this website and my 3D modeling portfolio. I’m in grad school, and I just wrote a paper that both my professor and I loved. I am the most proactive that I have ever been, and my mom was the most proactive person that I ever knew.
I know that I will never measure up to her, so maybe it’s better that I don’t try. Instead, maybe it’s better that she inspires me to keep pursuing my goals. In doing so, I could become my own version of Wonder Woman.
No, it wouldn’t be as amazing as a version who could speak three languages, sew her wedding dress, and survive re-education, but maybe if I can settle for being a quarter of the Wonder Woman that she was, then that can be enough.
